Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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