I wish I only lived at night.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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