so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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