I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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