Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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