Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
