just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
