i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
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