idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
