She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
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