i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
