idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
