"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
Randomize