HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
