I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
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