and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
I deserve this hangover.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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