after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
im six kinds of drunk right now
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
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