For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
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