lets start a swedish sibling band together
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
my poor anus
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
