I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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