He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Randomize
