The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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