did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Randomize