You work out of a Hotel?
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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