she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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