dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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