just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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