Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
But theres a keg here and me gusta
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
Randomize
