I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
