Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
We're facebook friends in real life
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
