Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
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