My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize