Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Randomize
