Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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