I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
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