I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
I intend to get homeless drunk
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
