Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
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