like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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