If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
I met the friendliest cop last night
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Randomize
