Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
too bad you live with your parents still
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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