i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I need moral support for this bender
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
