That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
