Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Someone shit on the floor
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
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