I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
That's how pantless uber rides happen
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Randomize
