I am puke
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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