Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Girls should come with a carfax report
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
