How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
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