dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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