Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Randomize
