You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
