I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
